An Absurd Interview with Danium

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Hello! Welcome to Absurd Interviews: 100% guaranteed or your money back.

I was informed that today is Danium's 13th birthday (what people don't know is that she has been 13 for at least 50 years by now but you didn't hear that from me) so congratulations to her! And as a birthday present I decided to have a nice interview with this fine and classy lady. So without any further delay, let's begin with this interview to Danium!


Hello Danium. How is my favourite chupacabra?
I'm currently bugged that my toothpicks aren't efficient enough to remove the residue from the steak I just ate. :cry:


Of how many social networks have you been banned from?
Only facebook but I keep coming back like herpes. Oh and social life, because when you are studying Chemistry you aren't allowed to have a social life. :(



If you were any type of cheese, how many holes do you think you would have?
Well if I take the Octet law in consideration I should have 8 electrons in my valence layer, so the only logical answer to that is I would have to be a car with 3 1/6th tyres. Which leads to cheese can't be a car so I'm obviously a motorcycle fuelled by the tears of emo kids.


Which deviant would you like to eat?
I would eat scrapsaurus because she has a fat ass so I bet that steak will be juicy. :hungry:


If you think no one is looking what is the one thing you would do?
I would change everyone's earrings with tampons dipped in red dye. :meow:


What do you love and hate the most about the human race?
I have always been interested in the ways of the species that lives on the third rock from the sun. I find their social interactions quite hilarious, it's almost like watching The Ork and The Beautiful. But I find their smell quite disturbing. :bleh:


If you were an alcoholic drink what would it be and why?
I would would be pure C2H5OH, because mixing ethanol is so mainstream. :iconhairfixplz:


If you could spend a night with a deviant who would it be? Why?
DaPineapple I will get him so drunk he will fall asleep and can't remember a thing that happened. Just so he wakes up in a forest next to a pot of gold and hired actor laurarts err I mean midgets to convince him he is truly a gnome.


If while talking to God he sneezes then what do you say?
'Can I have that tissue please?" I could totally sell it on ebay, everybody loves Morgan Freeman. 8-)


Thanks chupacabra. Give us some final words.
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN F :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN I :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN N :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN A :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN L :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME A MOMENT OF SILENCE :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN W :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN H :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN O :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN R :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN E :iconcheerplz:
:iconcheerplz: GIVE ME AN S :iconcheerplz:

:iconcheerplz: FINAL WHORES  :iconcheerplz:




This interview was brought to you by me. You're welcome.


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evilsyndicatemember's avatar
That skank didn't do a shout out for me. :stare: